| Guess which state gives unemployed people the least | | | | enlightenment, fahgeddaboudit. They HAD TO. |
| amount of money when they lose their jobs? | | | | Oh, and the law creates a one-week break in jobless |
| That would be Mississippi, which gives a maximum | | | | benefits. Our neighbors, Georgia and Kentucky, do not |
| amount of $210 weekly. (Most people get much less.) | | | | make a wage-earner wait for a week to get the |
| But that shameful amount is followed by my home | | | | pittance. |
| state of Alabama, now giving jobless workers a | | | | JOBLESS MOTHER: I need a paycheck. |
| maximum of $235, even if it's not their fault because | | | | LAWMAKER: You should have thought about that |
| the factory owner sent the plant overseas to Malaysia | | | | before you lost your job, Missy. JOBLESS MOTHER: |
| or China. But wait, there's HOPE! Our fine Legislature | | | | They closed the factory. I didn't have a say in the |
| gave final approval last week to a package of three | | | | matter. LAWMAKER: You should have thought about |
| bills that raised the state's maximum weekly benefit for | | | | that before you went to work at that particular |
| jobless workers to $255, starting this July. That's right, | | | | factory. JOBLESS MOTHER: That was 15 years ago. |
| you parent of three kids: you can get up to $255 a | | | | Who knew Vanity Fair bras and underwear would be |
| week when the factory closes. What a relief, eh? But | | | | sent to China? LAWMAKER: You should have known |
| guess what? Heh, heh, heh. That amount of money | | | | before you had two children, in that case. JOBLESS |
| may be considered TOO HIGH for your kids to get | | | | MOTHER: Well, if you had taught me something useful |
| Medicaid health care! So whoopee! The lawmakers in | | | | on that subject instead of ABSTINENCE ONLY, I might |
| their infinite wisdom have given you a raise and taken | | | | have been able to get a higher education and become |
| away one of your safety nets. | | | | a surgeon. |
| An Associated Press report informs us that | | | | By the way, the total amount of benefits that can be |
| Alabama's current maximum weekly benefit of $235 is | | | | paid - 26 weeks - remains the same as before. That |
| 49th in the nation. Slightly ahead of Alabama are | | | | would be okay if Alabama had a booming economy |
| Arizona (John McCain's home state) at $240 and | | | | and workers could segue from one job into another |
| Louisiana, at $258. Does John know what it means to | | | | with relative ease or some months of retraining. But |
| live on $240 a week if you have dependents? Should | | | | that's not the case. An astounding number of plants |
| he maybe be questioned about this? | | | | have closed here and gone offshore. So an |
| The increase in Alabama's maximum weekly benefits | | | | unemployed textile worker or coal refinery worker |
| brings Alabama's unemployment compensation | | | | must drive from one low-paying McDonald's to the |
| program in compliance with federal law. THIS MEANS | | | | next low-paying Burger King to apply for work, all the |
| THE ALABAMA LEGISLATURE HAD TO PASS | | | | while spending $4 per gallon. The moral of this tale: |
| THE LAW. So in case you thought our lawmakers | | | | Hold on to your job at all costs if you live in Alabama. |
| were doing this out of some sense of fair play and | | | | |