| If your marriage has reached the point where your | | | | approach that not only saved the marriage but |
| spouse wants you out of the house, then you need to | | | | eventually made the relationship better than either of |
| take some serious action to save the marriage. I have | | | | us had ever thought possible. Here is the basic |
| been there and although I am not a marriage | | | | foundation of what I learned: |
| counselor, I have personally experienced the pain and | | | | - I was making very common critical mistakes which |
| hopelessness of a troubled marriage. I saved my | | | | were hurting my chances to save the marriage. The |
| marriage even though my wife wanted me to move | | | | more I pushed, the more she pulled away. |
| out and was meeting with a divorce attorney! You can | | | | - I had to get myself out of the negative emotional |
| save your marriage too! | | | | state that I was in and replace it with a more |
| Although I am happier now in my marriage than I ever | | | | resourceful state. |
| thought possible, I'll never forget the day my wife | | | | - I had to commit myself 100% to saving my marriage |
| came to me in tears and said she was meeting with | | | | and stop the blame game. It was completely irrelevant |
| an attorney. She had been planning this for awhile and | | | | at that point who did what to whom and was |
| wanted me to move out of our home. The home we | | | | counter-productive to saving the marriage. |
| had built together! I was shocked and devastated | | | | - I had to begin taking specific steps to save the |
| beyond my ability to describe. Maybe you are feeling | | | | marriage. By saying specific things and behaving in |
| like that right now. | | | | specific ways, things began to change, even without |
| Being completely unprepared for this moment, but | | | | my spouse doing anything at all! |
| desperate to save my marriage, I did everything I could | | | | - Rather than focus on the individuals, the focus |
| think of to convince her to change her mind and | | | | becomes on the marriage itself, almost as if it is |
| reconsider. But despite my best thinking and sincere | | | | separate from the couple as individuals. |
| desire to show my love for her, it only made the | | | | This was nothing like traditional marriage counseling |
| problem worse! She seemed more determined than | | | | which actually has only a 20% success rate! Would |
| ever to go through with this breakup. | | | | you go to a doctor who only had a 20% success |
| A few days later, I stumbled almost by accident on an | | | | rate? |