| Being a divorced, single-parent is difficult. Life is hectic, | | | | - Asking your children is Mom/Dad is coming to their |
| and we often times feel guilty about the impact on the | | | | event? |
| children. We love them with all our heart and | | | | - Buying a pet for your children that can only stay at |
| don’t want to ever lose them. What we do as | | | | your home. |
| single parents, sometimes without knowing it, is force | | | | When you subtly force your children to choose, what |
| our children to choose between Mom and Dad. | | | | you are really doing is validating your own |
| How does this happen? It generally happens like this -- | | | | achievement or success. We aren’t aware that to |
| You decide you want to get a gift for your child | | | | “Be the Best” Mom or Dad you don’t have |
| children and when you do, your Ex goes out and has | | | | to come in 1st place, 2nd place works just as well. |
| to buy something as good or even better. Lucky | | | | It’s been taught to most of us to be the best and |
| kids. This is one-upmanship and is self-made. It’s | | | | strive to become #1. However, being a single parent, |
| a way for you, a Single Dad or Single Mom, trying to | | | | being #1 isn’t always the best thing. |
| show how much you love your kids by always buying | | | | Don’t get caught up in the trading gifts for love or |
| the best gift. What you are doing is just creating stress | | | | making comments about who is better. Take the |
| for the children, not the happiness you are searching | | | | time to do something with your children and show |
| for. | | | | them in person how much you love them. Mom and |
| Here are a few more ways we try to be the best | | | | Dad need to get into the “who loves them |
| and force our children to choose, sound familiar? | | | | more” game by spending quality one-on-one time |
| - After preparing an incredible meal for your children, | | | | and this turns out to be a win-win situation for |
| you declare that your home cooked cuisine is | | | | everyone. |
| “Better than anything Mom/Dad cooks.” | | | | One of the nicest compliments you can receive from |
| - You ask your children “Who drives | | | | your child/children is when they make a statement like, |
| better?”?Does Mom/Dad take you to your favorite | | | | “how lucky I am you’re my Dad/Mom because |
| store to buy clothes? ?Do you keep your children’s | | | | you never ask me to choose between you.” |
| favorite stuffed animals at your house only? | | | | It’s time to make it all about your children. Let your |
| - If you pick your children up, do you comment that | | | | children know they’re Number One with you! |
| it’s always YOU who picks them up? | | | | |