| -link"> | | | | they had their last child. I couldn’t get away from |
| I know you’ve heard it all before, the pregnancy | | | | it! |
| statistics over 40 are dismal. As far as I’m | | | | I realized I wasn’t ready to give up on getting |
| concerned, statistics are for statisticians. What about | | | | pregnant but I absolutely did not want to go through |
| the fact that the number of unintended pregnancies in | | | | anymore fertility treatments. I started researching |
| women between 40 and 44 is second only to | | | | natural methods to enhance fertility. I quit a high stress |
| teenagers? | | | | job, I started a totally new way of eating, and I went |
| Many women in their 40’s think their too old to | | | | back and confronted all the unresolved issues I had |
| get pregnant, they get little lax with their birth control, | | | | with my parents and my less-than-perfect upbringing. I |
| and bingo! | | | | also researched natural methods of balancing |
| I would venture to guess most women over 40 | | | | hormones, increasing pelvic circulation, and I changed |
| aren’t trying to get pregnant (and many have | | | | my pregnancy mindset’ through visualization |
| had sterilization procedures). I wonder what would | | | | and meditation. |
| happen to those statistics if all women over 40 tried to | | | | I was shocked when I became pregnant naturally just |
| get pregnant. I think we’d all be surprised. Our | | | | months after completing fertility treatments. |
| society and media is so age obsessed’ that | | | | Unfortunately, I was miscarrying by the time I realized I |
| women begin to believe their life is over at the age of | | | | was pregnant. Even though my miscarriage was |
| 40 (heck, now it’s more like 35). The message | | | | heartbreaking, I was ecstatic to finally know I could get |
| is you’ll need plastic surgery, you’ll be | | | | pregnant on my own. Now, more motivated than ever, |
| replaced by a trophy wife, you’ll have a hard | | | | I continued researching natural methods to enhance |
| time getting employed, and your chances of having a | | | | my fertility and I continued adding things to my |
| baby are less than your chances of winning the lottery. | | | | getting pregnant’ protocol. |
| As far as I’m concerned, I won the lottery, but it | | | | To make a long story short, I got pregnant two more |
| wasn’t by luck. I was 44 when I had my | | | | times, but miscarried both. Why was this happening? I |
| daughter who, in my totally unbiased opinion, is perfect. | | | | had the fetal tissue examined after a D&C, and |
| I had a normal pregnancy and normal delivery and I | | | | wouldn’t you know it, my baby was |
| conceived without fertility treatments. Yes, I’m | | | | chromosomally normal. So much for the well-meaning |
| the oldest mom at the playground, but so far, | | | | condolences, Something was probably wrong, it |
| nobody’s asked me if I’m her | | | | was a blessing. I continued trying to get pregnant, |
| grandmother. As a matter of fact, I’ve been | | | | even though I was now 43 years old. I could feel my |
| asked more than once, Are you having | | | | baby hovering over me. I needed to give her life. But, |
| another? I’m in the best shape of my life, | | | | when I was 43 and 11 months, I almost gave up. I |
| and even though my very active daughter wears me | | | | thought maybe my internal barometer’ was |
| out occasionally, I’m keeping up just fine. I | | | | broken. I was so sure I was going to have a baby, but |
| remember babysitting my niece and nephew when I | | | | here I was, almost 44, and still childless. My baby was |
| was in my 20’s — it wasn’t any | | | | out there but I couldn’t get to her. I reluctantly |
| easier back then. | | | | decided that it was really time to move on to childfree |
| Being an older’ mom is such a blessing. | | | | and get on with my life. |
| I’m wiser, more patient, and totally skilled at | | | | Two weeks later I found out I was pregnant. I was a |
| dealing with the trials and tribulations of a two-year-old. | | | | little angry that I finally made a firm decision to move |
| I have no hidden agendas for my daughter. Since | | | | on to childfree, and here I was, pregnant again! I guess |
| I’ve already accomplished everything I wanted | | | | preparedness finally met opportunity (I think I was the |
| to do in my life, I’m not trying to live my dreams | | | | healthiest human being on the planet by then). I was |
| through her. It’s her life, and I’m behind her | | | | cautious but excited nonetheless. We decided not to |
| no matter what path she takes. The comment I hear | | | | tell anyone or to see a doctor until any |
| most often is, She’s such a happy little girl. | | | | normal’ person would. I didn’t want a |
| I will admit I had an interesting journey to parenthood. | | | | blow by blow’ accounting of my hCG |
| My own childhood was less than perfect. I grew up | | | | numbers or a depressing speech about the risks of |
| with parents who were totally mismatched leaving me | | | | pregnancy at my age. When I finally did see my doctor |
| with a negative impression of marriage and family. As | | | | (one who was quite negative about women in their |
| a result, I waited until I was almost 37 to get married | | | | 40’s getting pregnant), he was bouncing off the |
| and didn’t even start trying to get pregnant until I | | | | walls with excitement! My ultrasound looked great! This |
| was almost 38. After a year of trying on our own, we | | | | one was going to make it. |
| went in for fertility treatments. I spent over two years | | | | The moral of my story is trust your instincts. If |
| trying medications, inseminations and IVF twice. The | | | | you know deep in your heart that you can do |
| medications and inseminations didn’t work at all, | | | | something, you probably can. I’m sure many |
| and the IVF’s ended in miscarriage and the | | | | doctors would use my story as an example of how |
| removal of my left fallopian tube. I became disillusioned | | | | difficult it is to have a child over 40. But, fertility |
| with the assembly line practice of my fertility clinic and | | | | treatments were probably the most detrimental factor |
| the amount of drugs and hormones I was pumping into | | | | working against me. There’s a higher incidence |
| my system was totally inconsistent with my all | | | | of tubal pregnancies with IVF and I’m sure all |
| natural’ way of life and personal philosophy. I | | | | those injections of drugs and hormones threw the |
| notified my doctor that I was moving on to | | | | delicate balance of my reproductive system further |
| childfree’. | | | | out of whack. If I would have started my all |
| I was over 40 at this point and as if to spur me on, no | | | | natural’ pregnancy protocol earlier, I would have |
| matter where I went or who I talked to, I would hear | | | | saved myself years of frustration, $25,000 in fertility |
| yet another story of a woman giving birth in her | | | | treatments, and I would have had both my fallopian |
| 40’s. I met a woman at my niece’s | | | | tubes essentially doubling my chances of getting |
| graduation party who gave birth to triplets at the age | | | | pregnant naturally. I partially blame those over-quoted |
| of 45 (without fertility treatments), a tenant in our rental | | | | statistics. I can’t tell you how many times I read |
| property all of a sudden tells me she gave birth to her | | | | that if you’re in your late 30’s or |
| son at the age of 45. A local radio personality said his | | | | 40’s you should run not walk to the |
| mother had him at the age of 48 (before the days of | | | | closest fertility clinic because time’s running out |
| fertility treatments). I was standing in the ski lift line and | | | | fast! |
| some teenagers behind us were laughing that their | | | | The bottom line is I overcame all of my challenges and |
| mom was going to have another baby at the age of | | | | succeeded naturally at the age of 44. So, for all you |
| 43. I started researching my own family history, and | | | | statisticians out there, I’d like to ask, What |
| both my grandmothers were in their 40’s when | | | | are the odds of that? |